Today Kate is snotty so we stayed home from church and went grocery shopping instead. It rained on us a little, which was like heaven. That made my morning just being able to experience the big gray cloud and the rain.
We are done having babies. We have these 4 lives we're in charge of and I'm maxed out. Every day it gets a little easier and little harder. Things just change. Riley's growing up, which makes conversations special and deeper. It also hits me that I have to stop treating her like she's 3 or she'll never want to speak to me when she's a teenager.
Lola, I just hang on to her sometimes and feel my heart breaking if I have to put her down. Knowing we're done fills me with peace and relief, but if I had one wish that could be granted, right now I might choose for Lola to stay 9 months forever. She hugs me and pats me and lays her head on me and smiles at me.
Riley and Claire will be off to school in a week! Little, sweet, tender-hearted Claire will be stepping into the big, scary world all on her own. I'm excited for her, but I don't think it's sunk in that she'll be gone for 7 hours of the day.
I get to keep crazy Kate though. She may be the coolest of our kids. Her personality keeps Nathan and I cracking up when we should be straight-faced and scolding her. I'm sure grocery store trips will get easier, but I'm pretty much in constant nervous breakdown mode when I'm with her in a store of any kind. She is never a bore.
Some days, when life is going slow; there's nowhere to be and I let the dishes sit. Nathan plays the piano and sings I and Love and You. The girls play without fighting for a few peaceful moments. I could just explode with the blessings I have.
I'm glad I'm not Julia Roberts on Eat Pray Love. I watched that movie yesterday and it made me grateful. She goes searching the world for this perfect balance to find herself. Whatever that means. Nathan and I were just talking about it last night, how good the dificult things are. It's been worth it to lose the sleep and stretch out my body and occasionally lose my mind.
However, I'm glad I went to Italy and had my "eat" before it all started. :) haha.
3 comments:
I'm glad you had your "eat" too. I don't think you need to go anywhere else to get your "love." Precious post. Stopping myself at eye watering.
Me too, Shan. That was lovely.
What a lovely post, Amanda! I love the way you approach hardships and blessings alike. I also feel like I am getting a sneak preview at stuff to come in my own life.
Post a Comment